The Experiment
by Zighana
Summary: Jaleel sets out to do the impossible; woo a raging lesbian. Jaleel/Diggy


**The Experiment**

 _Jaleel sets out to do the impossible; woo a raging lesbian. (Jaleel/Diggy one-shot)_

If there's one thing Jaleel will admit to himself, is that he's unlucky in love. It seems every pretty girl he liked had a catch, had one peculiar flaw that always turned him off. Too shallow, too stupid, too insecure, too vain; his somewhat dangerous lifestyle and overt pickiness lead to many nights where it was him and his right hand. Sure, he landed a few gorgeous women in his bed, but none were lucky enough to spend the night or make it past a bathroom stall tryst. They'd be quickly dismissed and it was then Jaleel would be left to his thoughts.

He's lost his muse; ever since Dom got locked up and Nakia is nowhere to be found, Jaleel lost his inspiration and hadn't been producing some catchy beats. His studio sits in front of him one morning, collecting dust and the equipment staring back at him in betrayal.

He needs to get back working.

It seems serendipity answered his prayers when Malcolm came knocking on his doorstep. Malcolm, the black Pointdexter, panting and sweaty while his friends look at him with their eyes full of fear.

They need his help.

Here they were, all around his studio, and it seems to spark to life. Laughter, guitar riffs, the loud beats of drums; it wasn't his type of music, but he likes it. It's different, it's loud, it's hitting him in colors and hues; if he can nod his head to the beat, it's a hit. Despite his interest in the music, his eyes are more focused on the cute drummer giving the song its rhythm.

She's lost in her zone, it seems; her eyes closed, pink tongue extended to catch the sweat of her golden peach skin. Her body moves with the rhythm she made, matching the harmonies without so much as breaking a sweat. Her sweat makes her crop top cling to her shape, outlining those perky titties that caught his attention. All of a sudden his throat feels dry, his body feels like it is hot and cold simultaneously and his nether regions are starting to wake up.

Stop, Jaleel. Stop and focus on being cool, calm, collected…

Fuck. He's using C's.

"Man, I'm hungry as fuck." Jib interjects. Jaleel snaps out of his thoughts and focuses on Jib.

"Okay, there's this burger joint a few minutes away. Ya'll come with me. Malcolm," he looks to him. He's looking back at his sister Lily, who's sashaying around the house wearing nothing but a robe.

Skank.

"We'll be back. Trust you can take care of Lily when we come back?"

It was a soft threat laced behind a command and both of them knew it. Malcolm stumbles for a response and Jaleel's out the door before he could even agree.

They take his car; it's obvious Diggy is riding in the front while Jib pisses and moans in the back. Why they're friends with him, he'll never know. He plays his music and it seems to drown out Jib's bitching and he can focus. Diggy stares off into the passenger window and Jaleel is forcing himself to try to think of something clever to say.

"So…you like burgers?"

Smooth, Jaleel. Smooth.

"Burgers? Well, yeah. Isn't that the reason we're going?"

"Well…" he trails off. "There's this chili cheese burger with extra cheese and some fries that can scoop up whatever chili spills out of it. There's this San Fran slider with avocado and bacon that's hella good. The provolone brings it together."

"I'm down for the chili cheese burger. That sounds fucking rad."

Rad? Who says rad anymore?

Brushing it aside, he nods his head and taps his fingers against the steering wheel, drumming the beat to the song playing on the radio. Kali Uchis's 'Know What I Want' seems to pick up the pace with her vocals.

"So, you got a man?" He's not one to beat around the bush. He wants to know and he wants to know now. Diggy chuckles, her pearly whites glowing in the California sun.

"No, I don't think any man wants to go for a girl like me."

A girl like her? What is she, insecure?

"A girl like you?" he presses.

"A girl like me…a raging dyke. I'm gay."

Ice falls into the pit of his stomach. Jaleel looks calm on the outside, but his insides are screaming and fiery.

Every pretty girl that catches his eye seems to have a deal-breaking catch.

Too insecure, too vain, too stupid, too lazy, and now, too gay.

Fate is none too kind to Jaleel.

"Cat got your tongue?" she asks, her eyes twinkling with mischief.

"No, I was just thinking about something." He says, then pulls up to the driveway.


End file.
